Hmm.... wellll, today did turn out to be an interesting day after all! Didn't think that anything else that happened today would merit a mention in the blog after having already written an entry today but. . . I guess I was proved wrong!
How much of it should I write? ummm. . . just enough for me to have 'written it out' and not enough for you to deduce exactly what happened! Besides, I just realized that my blog may freak out most of you who are quite reserved about what they feel and don't like to talk about it [hey, hang on, I do that too!] and to see someone writing everything out and laying it out as the bare truth they can't see usually, would, I admit, be mildly freaky! Yeah, it is a little explicit about what I think and about things that people may not agree to. Yeah, it is overly frank and honest. Yeah, it's wayyyy more talkative than I am in person! ;) [obvv, I'm the only one writing here! mwahahaha (evil laugh: totally without reason!)]
Well, anyway, back to the point. Here I am, at a very strange point of time in my life. 'Trying to' just 'get over it' now. And probably will too! Soon enough! More than the actual conversation I just had, it's memories of others that I'm thinking back to as I'm going back to my life. I remember a certain friend telling me 'you can get any guy you're really crazy about!' [ironically, I had a crush on this guy before!] And I remember another friend from my EB telling me 'I can't even begin to tell you how strong you are as a person. Dunno how I would have dealt with all that you have in life' And I remember another friend saying 'Chill, he wasn't worth the hurt anyway!' and I remember a friend just listening to me while I kept talking and talking and talking. It's ironic how I'm so spontaneous sometimes and so held back at others. What I think about love? Well, like always, I still believe it's the only real thing in the world! What do I think about the lovey dovey type of love? Ummm, works for sure, a bit tough sometimes, not understood by most people, too little in the world, and taken as a tragedy by people when it doesn't work out! Seriously, does is matter all that much if they love you back in the same amount or way that you love them? Did you set all these conditions before loving them? Well, in that case, it's ridiculous to call it love! Call if affection, passion, crush, infatuation or whatever, but don't call it love! I don't profess to be in love right now, nor do I claim that this kind of unconditional love lasts forever. I'm just saying that this is what I believe! And I believe it to be true! Love does not have to be forever. No, wait, Love is forever, but it's not the same kinda love and not necessarily the same person! Hehe, I like the way I think sometimes! Love is just energy, and that can be transformed! And it's limitless!
Sometimes, it isn't all that bad being single. It's quite cool in fact! It's just that sometimes, thodi sad si feeling ati hai! But just sometimes! Being single actually makes you want to complete yourself. And ideally, loving someone is to share your completeness with them, not just use them to make yourself complete! That's where all the problems come!
I'm just in a drifting state now [don't get me wrong, this random, drifting state of mine is not very visible when I'm at work these days!] and I'm feeling love [I repeat for the zillionth time on by blog - not just the lovey dovey kind!] and I love it!
Well anyway, I don't know the way forward from now on, but I think I do know the attitude I need to have.
P.S. I really like the pic!
P.P.S. What's weird is how the past has been coming back to me lately. People and friendships I thought would never come back! I like it! ;)
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