No regrets. . but.

I've learnt to live without regrets. Sure, I feel guilt and sadness, but I'm just an observer and not the one suffering because of them. That's good, of course, except that sometimes I become an observer when happiness happens as well. Yeah, in the bigger picture it's a good thing, but it doesn't always feel right somehow.

I'm (slightly) more responsible now that I'm approaching 22.. weird how I never thought that so many things that matter now never used to. And things that were the center of my universe have just dissolved and ceased to have any meaning.
Except you, of course. I'm still not over it, and I don't know if/when I will be. I've tried to get over it, but looks like it's just not meant to be yet.
Of all the bad/upsetting things I may have done, my heart is pure, and it still loves you with every beat.

It feels like the essence is what matters the most. All the other flavors of life are fading. The intentions, love, emotions and causes/reasons mean more than the actions. Not always, but there's some kind of veil that's been swept aside and there's more than just good vs bad.

There are no regrets about anything. . . but. Yes, there's still a 'but' at the end.


And yeah, just for the record, I still care. About you.