Shifting to a new blog. . . maansibansal.wordpress.com

Back to December. . Stayyy

Hmm. . so there are always new songs and new emotions that become connected to them.

I like these two, but don't have any memories attached (yet).

Perhaps it is destiny, and I shouldn't even tell you that I love you!!
Perhaps. . .

Flying high!

You know, there are a lot of things that a bird would represent. Especially this one.







Like:
Freedom
Ability to let go
Courage to fly beyond your imagination
Peace
Happiness
Letting go
Staying grounded
Confidence/Pride
Humility
Beauty and grace
Purity
Untouched and above the small games people get caught up in
Not materialistic
They're said to represent a link between heaven and earth. For me, I'll interpret it as being in touch with your higher self. :)
Hope
And somehow, just somehow. . love and loyalty. Being true to your own true nature. :)

There's a possibility. . .

There's a possibility
There's a possibility
All that I had was all I'm gonna get


There's a possibility
There's a possibility
All I gonna get is gone with your step
All I gonna get is gone with your stare
So tell me when you hear my heart stop
You're the only one that knows
Tell me when you hear my silence
There's a possibility I would't know
mmmmmmmmmmmmmm

Know that when you leave
Know that when you leave
By blood and by me, you walk like a thief,
By blood and by me, and I fall when you leave
So tell me when you hear my heart stop
You're the only one that knows
Tell me when you hear my silence
There's a possibility I wouldn't know
So tell me when my sigh is over
You're the reason why I'm closed
Tell me when you hear me falling
There's a possibility it wouldn't show


By blood and by me, and I'll fall when you leave.
By blood and by me, I follow your lead.

Desert rain

I miss you so much,
Now I'm awake,
Just hold me tight,
In every dream you're my guiding light.


We, we were lost
This, walk of pain
I miss you so much, now I call again, Come, come tonight
Just, hold me tight
From this desert rain, you`re my guiding light

We, we were lost,
This, walk of tide
We forgot about love, we forgot about us
Now, I am here, dreams become real

I feel like the sand is blowing away
Into the storm
I'm inside this dream
That feels just like
a desert rain

We, we were lost
This, walk of pain
I miss you so much, now I call again, Come, come tonight
Just, hold me tight
From this desert rain, you`re my guiding light

We, we were lost,
This, walk of tide
We forgot about love, we forgot about us
Now, I am here, dreams become real

I feel like the sand is blowing away
Into the storm
I'm inside this dream
That feels just like
a desert rain

You will always have my soul
Even dreams are secret worlds
Missing you

I feel like the sand is blowing away
Into the storm
I'm inside this dream
That feels just like
a desert rain

No regrets. . but.

I've learnt to live without regrets. Sure, I feel guilt and sadness, but I'm just an observer and not the one suffering because of them. That's good, of course, except that sometimes I become an observer when happiness happens as well. Yeah, in the bigger picture it's a good thing, but it doesn't always feel right somehow.

I'm (slightly) more responsible now that I'm approaching 22.. weird how I never thought that so many things that matter now never used to. And things that were the center of my universe have just dissolved and ceased to have any meaning.
Except you, of course. I'm still not over it, and I don't know if/when I will be. I've tried to get over it, but looks like it's just not meant to be yet.
Of all the bad/upsetting things I may have done, my heart is pure, and it still loves you with every beat.

It feels like the essence is what matters the most. All the other flavors of life are fading. The intentions, love, emotions and causes/reasons mean more than the actions. Not always, but there's some kind of veil that's been swept aside and there's more than just good vs bad.

There are no regrets about anything. . . but. Yes, there's still a 'but' at the end.


And yeah, just for the record, I still care. About you.

Happy shiny and slightly introspective

So life is interesting and happy shiny one again. :)

Getting over some things, finding new aspects of myself and making peace with the emotions that aren't ready to go just yet. :)

I've always been freaked out by kids, and not knowing what to do around them. Well, that's changed for sure! Teaching part time, I can see a whole different world. The transparent and pure expressions on their faces and the absolutely adorable things they do have got me falling in love with each one of them. Even when I get exasperated with them! It's my happy shiny hour of the day.

Been missing gym, in more ways than one. :( But starting again from tomorrow morning! :D

I'm realizing that I'm quite dispassionate/detached from the things that go on around me. sure, I notice them and acknowledge them, but reacting to them isn't something I do too often. And feeling guilty or regretting something is just not a part of who I am anymore. What's the point of guilt anyway? If you didn't care at that time, what5 will feeling guilty do for you now? It's over and done with, so you might as well sit back and enjoy the memories. ;)

Also, since it's winter nl, I absolutely loveeee soaking in the sun! It feels like I'm in the perfect world in the perfect place everrr! :)

And yes, I also realize that I am quite detached from the people I love too. Not always though. Sometimes I miss everyone terribly and feel crazily happy after seeing them after 2-3 days! Maybe I'm just not as expressive as I used to be or it's just a phase, or I'm in too much of a happy shiny mode! I'm not sure why I'm so darn happy, but I am. and it doesn't have too much to do with external circumstances.

Oh, and as for 'you', yes I still care for you a lot. Still pretty much in love, but slowly getting over it. And I'm at peace with wherever it goes or doesn't go. :)

I can't & I don't.

I guess I could but somehow I feel I shouldn't.

So - Even if I can, practically I can't and so, I won't.

My only fear is what if tomorrow I awake and

realize that 'Hey dude - You could've but you didn't !'

Buy me with a coffee

Instead of wasted gifts around
Instead of losing all we have
Instead of dreaming of a man you'll never have
You'd better breathe with me and feel...

Instead of planning and debating
Instead of shaping my own dreams
Instead of dreaming of a son you'll never have
You'd better breathe with me and feel...

You can buy me with a coffee
I'm so cheap...

Instead of letting distance talk
Instead of losing all we have
Instead ofdreaming of a man I'll never be
You'd better breathe with me and feel...

Instead of juding day and night
Instead of wasted time on both sides
Instead of guessing what the hell went wrong with me
You'd better breathe with me and feel...

You can buy me wïth a coffee
I'm so cheap...